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Yeah – it’s true.   I admit it.

I’m an emotion-junky.   I just lap that shit up.

 

What?   C’mon.   You’re always fascinated by the stuff that’s outside your experience.   Brix: furious, triumphant, fucking terrified.   Harm: elated, bitter, in a creative frenzy.   The biology teacher I terrorized in class yesterday, much to my peers’ amusement: frustrated, despairing, unspeakably angry…   You’re all just so easy to provoke, and then so entertaining to try and predict.

Yet there’s an odd side-effect to my little voyeuristic, vicarious, and – let’s face it – venomous hobby.

 

People think I’m a good listener.

No, seriously.   Makes me piss myself laughing as well, but I fucking swear.   Totally true.   Probably because I’m just so engrossed watching anyone fire up or melt down that they think I actually give a shit.   Plus I never interrupt.   Because I have no idea what the hell to say, of course.   Because I don’t empathize.

At all.

Harm sees through it.   Spills her issues about her determinedly dysfunctional family, then kicks me in the shins because she knows its all empty soap opera to me.   Claudia, her latest girlfriend, told her it’s because I’m male.   Or immature.   Or something.

But Harm knows I’m just a cold uncaring bastard – though apparently that’s preferable to other friend options.   She’s coming over later after school to avoid doing her Spanish homework, smoke on my balcony, and tell me how her dad skipped therapy again because he felt his ‘lucky streak on the rise’ and the week’s rent burning a gambling hole in his pocket.

For her I’m gonna predict angry, disappointed, hurt – maybe some lurking selfish concern that obsessive addictive personalities run in the family…?

I’ll let you know after how close I was.   Bring on the emotion fix – shoot me up.

 

NEXT ENTRY…

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4 Comments

  1. DAMN!!! would give ANYTHING to not have to react to the shit around me, not get upset at redneck in laws..Are U sure u don’t want to be a parent?

  2. Don’t you live the ‘blessed’ life.. Not having a care in the world. Lucky SOB =P

  3. I agree with both ladies!!!

  4. I wouldn’t say he’s lucky, if he doesn’t care it’s only because he feels nothing. Hence the blog i presume. He’s only going through the motions of living even though he’s already dead inside and out. It’s sad actually because being so alone isn’t lucky at all. Imagine not having enough Passion to give a shit. I’d hardly call it “life” and especially not a “blessed life”. It’s more of like a curse.


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